QOTD: Your Crappiest Gift

Today's question is from Aspiring Ebert, who wants to know, "What's the crappiest/weirdest holiday gift you've ever received?" She thinks the answers will be amusing, and so do I. Bad homemade art from your kids doesn't count; we're talking about gifts from people who should know better.Mine's easy. My in-laws gave me a lint roller one year. I'm not kidding. It wasn't the only thing I got, mind